CRUISE COUNSELOR

Navigating Rough Waters

Can a cruise put your relationship back on course?

By Janet Groene

When her marriage seemed headed for the rocks, Marilyn Barnicke Belleghem packed up her three kids and took them on vacation. Mom and the kids swam, took beach walks, and bonded on a new level. By the time their father left, they had a strong bond and "could laugh at our happy memories," Belleghem reveals.

This story has a happy ending. The couple eventually reconciled and everyone went on another trip, this time as a reunited family. Bellegham, now a registered marriage and family therapist who writes books on travel as therapy, remains a strong believer in the "geography cure."

Whether it's a troubled romance, parent-child friction, in-law problems, or just a friendship that has lost its compass, a cruise may be the perfect prescription for what ails you and yours. Dr. Bonnie Weil, author of Adultery, the Forgivable Sin, believes that a new setting can remove everyday stresses on a relationship and give a couple a chance to see one another as the lovers they once were. A cruise is one way to re-explore a relationship, discover new and old things about one another, and reconfirm feelings. Weil believes that "it's a starting ground for working on a relationship."

Elizabeth R. Lombardo, Ph.D., practices psychology and physical therapy in Wexford, Pennsylvania. The author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness, she sees most relationship problems as a vicious cycle. "High levels of stress cause us to see more negatives, which causes us to be irritable and unpleasant, which causes our partner to react negatively, which causes higher levels of stress."